Your wrestler persona & theme song

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Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Werel on Mon Jul 10, 2017 11:20 am

I started watching GLOW the other night* and was intrigued by the problem of picking a good wrestling persona. So: if you were a wrestler, what would your shtick be? Costume? Name? Theme song? Are you a heel or a good guy? Uh... what else goes into a wrestling persona, signature moves?

GO

*Disclaimer: I know pretty much nothing about wrestling except that there are personas and theme songs and heels and good guys.
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 12:01 pm

I would more naturally play heel/bad guy. The type would depend on the country, I'd prefer tailoring the act to the area rather than trying to be the same thing everywhere. All of this pre-supposes that I'd be good enough at wrestling to rise up to whatever level I'd want to do these things. Skill-wise, I'd want to be an all-arounder like a Chris Jericho, someone who can hang with any style but doesn't necessarily do a lot of dangerous stunts or dives.

Mexico: Mexico is all about wild gesticulations and explosive movements. Latinos are a firey people in general and luchadors who wear masks have to learn how to emote with their body language (because you can't see their facial expressions through the mask). I'm not sure of a name, but I think I would act like an idiot most of the time. I'd be very much in the ["oh yeah? I can do that move too and better than you!" *fucks up the move and then throws angry tantrum when the crowd laughs*] mold. I would profess my undying love for the ring-card girls when they came down between falls (with the pre-existing set-up that they are going to completely ignore me) and just play off of goofy things like that (like following one of them backstage and missing half of a fall before realizing it and high-tailing it back to the ring). And other stupid shit.

Signature Moves: I dunno, but I've always loved Alberto Del Rio's step-up Enziguri



Japan: I would take up a "Conquering Emperor of Japan" gimmick, where I'd proclaim that the Japanese used to be tough but now they're weak, and because they're weak, someone like me (implied to be a white man) can walk into their country and take over everything without a problem. I'd hope to be able to double-anger people, the older generation will hate it that a white guy is saying the things they're saying and they can't do anything about it, and the younger generation will hate because here's this white guy saying things their parents or grandparents are saying. I'd have the kanji for "King" or "Emperor" painted across my face, I'd come out with some kind of Imperial-looking Emperor's Robes, I would probably try to get some kind of submissive geisha woman to bow at my feet before a match (the implication being, to the victor go the spoils), one of my signature moves would be to deliver a basement dropkick to my opponents knees so that they drop down to one or both knees and it looks like they're bowing down to me. My finisher would be named the "Heisei Death Festival" assuming Akihito is still kicking around, because when I hit it, the Era is over and I'm in charge.

The move itself would probably be some variation of Brock Lesnar's F5



and Hashimoto's Spike DDT/Brainbuster (Hashimoto's nickname was the "King of Destruction", so it's even playing off of the idea that I'm taking everything from Japanese Emperors)



North America:

There was a wrestler named Edge in the '00s who would do any kind of low-down, dirty thing to win and retain titles, and I like the idea of uncool chicken-shit badguys because it's a very tough role to play (most bad-guys want to be cool bad-guys or funny bad guys, still somewhat likeable, and not be as embarrassed as chicken-shit heels get when it finally comes around to them). I'd run my mouth as much as I could in whatever company I was to try to talk tough, I'd want to say things that would hit whatever local area we're in below the belt (bashing the local sports team is a safe and regular way to make the crowd safe-mad, I'd want be in like Michigan and letting everyone know I wanted to win my match quickly so I could go find somewhere that has a clean glass of water) and then cheat or back-off or do whatever other thing to escape the situation because I'm not as good as I think I am. I'd probably try to base my look on Freddie Mercury from Queen with a bit of Bruce Lee in his yellow jumpsuit. I dunno about first names, but I like the idea of "Prince" as a last name because "King" sounds tough whereas "Prince" makes you sound like an effeminate rock-star or some kind of weak-ass nerd (you're not tough enough to be King ofc) who'd get their ass kicked in a real fight, but it's also a royal-sounding name that helps you when you mouth off at people (could even do a nickname like the "Heir Apparent")

Move-wise, it wouldn't be my finisher, but it tickles me whenever I see the Spinning Toe-Hold because it's such a weak looking move for today's style that I'd probably try to incorporate it into my moves



Also I'd want to learn how to throw fire



Follow that king


Last edited by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 1:15 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Werel on Mon Jul 10, 2017 1:11 pm

Oh my GOD, that's hard to follow, those are fucking hilarious heel personas

That adds new dimensions to the question, though, I hadn't considered there being different persona types for different markets. BRB coming up with like 9 different personas for every country I could wrestle in
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Werel on Mon Jul 10, 2017 3:08 pm

I think I’d want to be a heel in every context too. That seems like the most fun option, plus probably the most natural one for me

North America: I’m torn between a 1% Ivory Tower shtick and a straight crazy swamp demon persona. Either I’m incapable of speaking in anything less than ten dollar words and trafficking in burns too recherché for my opponents to even understand that they’ve been burned, OR I’m like a gibbering bloodsmeared trickster spirit that emerges from the leaf litter on the outskirts of a dying Rust Belt town. If the latter, gotta go with this (from 0:12 to 1:08) as my entry song, and I’d probably rely pretty hard on gimmicks like poisoning people’s drinks and fucking with the ghosts of my opponents’ dead loved ones in order to demoralize them, but I think maybe they don’t do anything that weird in mainstream wrestling. So let’s go with The Chancellor, avatar incarnate of the bloated higher ed administration, whose PhD has equipped her to earn a high six figures for speaking at graduations and snaring Long Island matriculates, and who rests securely in having a higher inherent human value than the unwashed plebs in the audience by virtue of possessing a terminal degree from an R1 university. Fighting style, like rhetorical style, is slippery and disingenuous. “I presume you haven’t read ____” a possible catchphrase, as is anything in French. Heckling individual audience members for their backwards political positions, ignorance of German composers, and unfortunate bodily shortcomings gets the crowd warmed up.

Japan: Uhhh I think probably American stereotypes are played out as a gimmick, but some kind of over-the-top filthy white trash sexual predator would be a fun one, in the spirit of this Tim & Eric sketch. The Cornfed Carnivore. Come out in greasy sweatpants and way-too-tight tank top (for fat bulges, natch) that says JUICY PRINCESS in sparkles, maybe an early Eminem track for the theme song, comedy stink lines that make the refs and MCs pass out, insane heavy makeup that looks like it’s been slept in for a couple days. Lascivious lip-licking about how I love them pretty Jap-an-eeze boys and they can’t resist me, with sight gags about how they literally cannot physically resist me despite trying very hard to escape, à la Elmyra from Tiny Toons. Perhaps I am eating a fried chicken thigh during most of my promos. A 64-ounce soda labeled “small”. Since I tower over most Japanese opponents, and Americans are smelly and disgusting, signature moves are basically just falling on them and farting. The Enola Spray.

Lutte/Laamb (West African wrestling, esp. Senegalese style): The White Savior. Come out to Toto’s Africa dressed in an Urban Outfitters dashiki. In most lutte traditionelle you bring a holy man with you, who’s like a combo hype man and sorcerer; he protects you with charms and amulets, plus gets the crowd on your side. My holy man would be an Oberlin undergrad with blond dreadlocks named Mason or Jayden and all my amulets would be like plastic zebras and made-in-China necklaces in the shape of the African continent. I’d be “so blessed to be here in the motherland with you beautiful, natural people” and “excited to share my journey of how I became the number one world expert on Laamb.” All of my moves would be parodically wrong and off-beat and awkward looking because white people, and I’d be constantly mispronouncing terms with great confidence, Peggy Hill-style. I think I’d be one of those bad guys that fights super dirty but tries to make it look like I’m the innocent victim when the ref gets called, like do an eye-gouge and pretend the other person ran into my thumb to injure my hands. Maybe my signature move would be called the Development Plan.
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 4:06 pm

Werel wrote:
North America: I’m torn between a 1% Ivory Tower shtick and a straight crazy swamp demon persona. Either I’m incapable of speaking in anything less than ten dollar words and trafficking in burns too recherché for my opponents to even understand that they’ve been burned, OR I’m like a gibbering bloodsmeared trickster spirit that emerges from the leaf litter on the outskirts of a dying Rust Belt town. If the latter, gotta go with this (from 0:12 to 1:08) as my entry song, and I’d probably rely pretty hard on gimmicks like poisoning people’s drinks and fucking with the ghosts of my opponents’ dead loved ones in order to demoralize them, but I think maybe they don’t do anything that weird in mainstream wrestling. So let’s go with The Chancellor, avatar incarnate of the bloated higher ed administration, whose PhD has equipped her to earn a high six figures for speaking at graduations and snaring Long Island matriculates, and who rests securely in having a higher inherent human value than the unwashed plebs in the audience by virtue of possessing a terminal degree from an R1 university. Fighting style, like rhetorical style, is slippery and disingenuous. “I presume you haven’t read ____” a possible catchphrase, as is anything in French. Heckling individual audience members for their backwards political positions, ignorance of German composers, and unfortunate bodily shortcomings gets the crowd warmed up.






Japan: Uhhh I think probably American stereotypes are played out as a gimmick, but some kind of over-the-top filthy white trash sexual predator would be a fun one, in the spirit of this Tim & Eric sketch. The Cornfed Carnivore. Come out in greasy sweatpants and way-too-tight tank top (for fat bulges, natch) that says JUICY PRINCESS in sparkles, maybe an early Eminem track for the theme song, comedy stink lines that make the refs and MCs pass out, insane heavy makeup that looks like it’s been slept in for a couple days. Lascivious lip-licking about how I love them pretty Jap-an-eeze boys and they can’t resist me, with sight gags about how they literally cannot physically resist me despite trying very hard to escape, à la Elmyra from Tiny Toons. Perhaps I am eating a fried chicken thigh during most of my promos. A 64-ounce soda labeled “small”. Since I tower over most Japanese opponents, and Americans are smelly and disgusting, signature moves are basically just falling on them and farting. The Enola Spray.

1) American stereotypes are never out of style
2)




Lutte/Laamb (West African wrestling, esp. Senegalese style): The White Savior. Come out to Toto’s Africa dressed in an Urban Outfitters dashiki. In most lutte traditionelle you bring a holy man with you, who’s like a combo hype man and sorcerer; he protects you with charms and amulets, plus gets the crowd on your side. My holy man would be an Oberlin undergrad with blond dreadlocks named Mason or Jayden and all my amulets would be like plastic zebras and made-in-China necklaces in the shape of the African continent. I’d be “so blessed to be here in the motherland with you beautiful, natural people” and “excited to share my journey of how I became the number one world expert on Laamb.” All of my moves would be parodically wrong and off-beat and awkward looking because white people, and I’d be constantly mispronouncing terms with great confidence, Peggy Hill-style. I think I’d be one of those bad guys that fights super dirty but tries to make it look like I’m the innocent victim when the ref gets called, like do an eye-gouge and pretend the other person ran into my thumb to injure my hands. Maybe my signature move would be called the Development Plan.

Probably the wrong type of wrestling
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by enail on Mon Jul 10, 2017 4:37 pm

Crap, this is surprisingly hard. I'd way rather be heel, but I could see a few personas that would work better for face.

North America: Definitely heel. I do a great old-school megalomaniac who whiplashes between charming and magnanimous and explosive rage, so I'd be keen to work that in there. Since I'm puny and implausible-looking as a wrestler, I'd probably have to be pretty delusional to go with such a self-assured persona,  so maybe I pretty much think I'm the super-villain in a fantasy novel and strut around trying to smite people with my awesome power and muscles, so you're never quite sure how much I believe, if I just think I'm awesome and pattern myself after that kind of character or if I genuinely think life is a fantasy novel.. until someone beats me up hard enough to shatter my self-image and I flip into rage, screaming incoherently and going for my opponent's throat in a vicious, mad dog fighting style that probably gets me disqualified as often as not, and if someone other than my opponent needles me right, I'll completely forget about my opponent and go for them. Name could be something like Raxanor the Arcane, which of course I would quickly be renamed Raxanor the Insane.

Japan: I'm thinking a try-hard gaijin who speaks terrible Japanese but insists on trying, and tries to show lots of respect for Japanese culture but botches everything, is annoyingly over-eager and doesn't really wrestle all that well, but just tries so fucking hard at all of it that you eventually kind of have to root for me. So, a low-level face? Eventually some senior wrestler that I fangirl takes pity on me and takes me under their wing to give me a shot.  My signature move would be an awkwardly done near-copy of one of my idols' signature moves, I don't do it right but somehow push through and smash the other person anyway.  Ganbaru Girl?

...these are pretty bad
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 5:02 pm

enail wrote:
North America: Definitely heel. I do a great old-school megalomaniac who whiplashes between charming and magnanimous and explosive rage, so I'd be keen to work that in there. Since I'm puny and implausible-looking as a wrestler, I'd probably have to be pretty delusional to go with such a self-assured persona,  so maybe I pretty much think I'm the super-villain in a fantasy novel and strut around trying to smite people with my awesome power and muscles, so you're never quite sure how much I believe, if I just think I'm awesome and pattern myself after that kind of character or if I genuinely think life is a fantasy novel.. until someone beats me up hard enough to shatter my self-image and I flip into rage, screaming incoherently and going for my opponent's throat in a vicious, mad dog fighting style that probably gets me disqualified as often as not, and if someone other than my opponent needles me right, I'll completely forget about my opponent and go for them. Name could be something like Raxanor the Arcane, which of course I would quickly be renamed Raxanor the Insane.




Japan: I'm thinking a try-hard gaijin who speaks terrible Japanese but insists on trying, and tries to show lots of respect for Japanese culture but botches everything, is annoyingly over-eager and doesn't really wrestle all that well, but just tries so fucking hard at all of it that you eventually kind of have to root for me. So, a low-level face? Eventually some senior wrestler that I fangirl takes pity on me and takes me under their wing to give me a shot.  My signature move would be an awkwardly done near-copy of one of my idols' signature moves, I don't do it right but somehow push through and smash the other person anyway.  Ganbaru Girl?
:

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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by enail on Mon Jul 10, 2017 5:14 pm

I like it!
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Garlic Junior on Mon Jul 10, 2017 6:25 pm

OMFG I love this topic too much and Max's responses to everything.

I seriously can't dedicate the time to mine right now as it is 2.30am but I am going to sleep on some babyface ideas and report back.

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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 6:54 pm

Yeah, my responses are actually characters who are or have portrayed similar ideas to your own gimmick ideas.
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by EncouragementMachine on Mon Jul 10, 2017 7:02 pm

We need some balance to all these heels! Wink

My persona would treat each fight like tousles between siblings. Whole schtick is to not be imposing. Less impact strikes, more lift up-and-throw-across-the-ring and laugh. Breaking up folks who are too into it. Passing out cookies to the audience as I enter the ring. Good sportsmanship winning or losing. Honoring opponent's birthdays. Sure, we're here to compete but let's have fun with it! The mind games come in the meaner a fighter I'm up against, how do you maintain aggression against someone who's wishing you good luck and liked your last fight?

Going to Japan only thing that'd change is less big laughs and more manners and deliberate shows of deference/respect. Going to Mexico, more flamboyant colors.

Intro song - Ziggy Marley - Love is My Religion

Signature move - Big laughing bear hug into belly-to-belly suplex.

Finisher - Some variant of frog splash.
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 7:05 pm

Hogan or Cena pretty much :p
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by EncouragementMachine on Mon Jul 10, 2017 7:17 pm

Madzimum Thrill wrote:Hogan or Cena pretty much :p

I don't know what he was like at his height, but Hogan is a stone's throw from Cosby level gross. Pass.

Cena seems too macho, too GI Joe. All flex and braggadocio. He'll hawk kids' cereal but I can't imagine him making nobody any cookies.

I was aiming more for affable and hippie-minus-tie-dye. Down to earth.
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Mon Jul 10, 2017 7:37 pm

Cena's got the record for most wishes granted for the Make-A-Wish-Foundation and once fixed an engaged couples impending break-up while he was drunk. Good guy, that Cena.

>affable and hippie



Daniel Bryan says hello
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Werel on Tue Jul 11, 2017 9:52 am

Madzimum Thrill wrote:




That first one: I love seeing only moderately intelligent people try to play the arrogant supergenius card when you can just smell their actual mediocrity, it's delicious. < /heel>


1) American stereotypes are never out of style
2)

YES EXACTLY

Who is that, I may have to watch her in action

Enail wrote:Ganbaru Girl?
I would watch all of Ganbaru Girl's matches, that's straight adorable Laughing

EncouragementMachine wrote:My persona would treat each fight like tousles between siblings. Whole schtick is to not be imposing. Less impact strikes, more lift up-and-throw-across-the-ring and laugh. Breaking up folks who are too into it. Passing out cookies to the audience as I enter the ring. Good sportsmanship winning or losing. Honoring opponent's birthdays. Sure, we're here to compete but let's have fun with it! The mind games come in the meaner a fighter I'm up against, how do you maintain aggression against someone who's wishing you good luck and liked your last fight?
Hahhh, I would love to fight this guy as a heel. He'd be like a high-level misanthropy obstacle course. "I CAN PROVE HE'S ACTUALLY A TERRIBLE PERSON, JUST WATCH"
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Madzimum Thrill on Tue Jul 11, 2017 9:57 am

Werel wrote:

YES EXACTLY

Who is that, I may have to watch her in action

Big Bertha Faye in 1995 WWF. They tried to get a Women's division going but fans weren't really into it, so it didn't last beyond that year. Mostly wrestled against Alundra Blazye/Madusa Miceli
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by Werel on Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:19 am

Hahaha looks like I just cribbed a classic persona without knowing it, good stuff



I get it, she's fat but she's acting like a pretty lady, I get the joke

(I wouldn't want to fight that chick affraid )
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by EncouragementMachine on Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:31 am

Werel wrote:Hahhh, I would love to fight this guy as a heel. He'd be like a high-level misanthropy obstacle course. "I CAN PROVE HE'S ACTUALLY A TERRIBLE PERSON, JUST WATCH"

Heels are fun because of how over the top you can go, but who says you can't go over the top either way? Laughing I'll make your heart grow three sizes and pop, then send your mama flowers. "Sorry I grinched your son, ma'am."
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Re: Your wrestler persona & theme song

Post by EncouragementMachine on Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:40 am

Werel wrote:Hahaha looks like I just cribbed a classic persona without knowing it, good stuff

I get it, she's fat but she's acting like a pretty lady, I get the joke

(I wouldn't want to fight that chick affraid )

All I took away was they spent like a solid minute talking about and making references to Duckman. It ran for all of 2 years! Nobody watched it! It's probably just a normal in-network push, but in 2017 that was a moment of surrealism.
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